Last week, Marko on the Slant33 blog asked the question of:

We have learned that teenagers live in a world isolated from adults, and unfortunately, most of our ministries perpetuate this.  How are you addressing this problem?

My thoughts:

Students in the American church are experiencing a loneliness epidemic known as systematic abandonment. So what are some responses when addressing abandonment?

In my youth ministry experience it has been my mission, joined with the Holy Spirit, to intentionally respond to this systematic abandonment issue. I have responded in two approaches: 1) Proactively assimilating students into the church body; and 2) Getting more adults in the lives of kids through the small group model.

See, there is a reason why I call this website an experiment lab for youth pastors.  I thoroughly enjoy looking at the laws of physics and intersecting them with youth ministry.  Granted God engineered these systems (Psalm 19.1)  so I think it is fair to say there is overlap between physics and youth ministry.

My hypothesis:  For the postmodern teen I believe putting them in unfamilar and uncomfortable environments “to do hands on” ministry will greatly test their spiritual maturity.

The Law of Inertia states:  Unless acted upon by an outside force, a body at rest stays at rest and a body in motion stays in motion.

How the Law of Inertia can create spiritual growth in our teens: a student’s faith will remain the same unless acted upon an external force.

Our students’ spiritual life tends to quickly move to “idleness” real fast.  They get saved, they get baptized, they go to church, they follow Jesus’ commandments, then what?  They hit the autopilot button until they graduate.

Many of our students leave our youth group without having a crisis of faith or even having to demonstrate their faith.  I almost think we should manufacture mini-crisis situations that force students to act.  I know this may seem dark and counter-productive, but students are leaving youth group with the same faith they had when they were in 7th grade.  Our students need to be put in environments that apply external force which forces them to test drive their faith.

I think Sir Isaac Newton law of inertia has many corollaries to the spiritual development of a teen.  If Newton was a youth pastor you could almost bet he would apply disruptions in order to produce spiritual growth.  In order to get something to move you have to apply pressure or the spiritual life of a teen will plateau— very quickly.

Applying external force on students’ spirituality requires them to:

- pray to God immediately

- ask God to reveal Himself to them right now

-  test God and see if He will use them

-  heavily rely on God asap

-  exit out of the “comfortable” zone and enter the uncomfortable zone

Applying force puts an urgency on the teen to make a decision of:  Do I really believe this so much that I will act for God?

In Luke 10.1-10, Jesus send out 72 of his followers and said go serve, bless and pray for others in the community.  It is going to be uncomfortable but this is what it means to be the Kingdom of God here and now.

So what are some ways youth pastors create mini external forces that challenge student to act for God?

-  Take your students to apologetic debates between a Christian and an Atheist.  Look at your local colleges or university philosophy departments and see if they have debates happening.  Sometimes they will sponsor religion departments.  Or visit the Stand To Reason website here.  The Stand To Reason guys and gals are from Biola who do the debate thing really well.

-  Take your students on a gnarly 3rd world international mission trip.  My top three picks:  Belize, Haiti and Nicaragua.

-  Invite your students to fast together as a group for more than 30 hours.  The go to event is the 30 hour famine.

-  Randomly start asking students to share their testimony in youth group.  Giving students to talk to other students why Jesus changed their life is so important.

-  Once a quarter randomly select a few nights where you invite your students to go out to the local community and pray for people.  

-  Start practicing hour long solitude times during youth group programming.  Awkward silence creates such an opportunity for the students to search their hearts and the scriptures while asking God what He is doing in and through their life.

-  Visit other churches that are completely opposite in style.  The goal is to find churches that are so different than yours that make you uncomfortable.

-  Invite students to pray out loud in multiple settings at multiple times.  And no I am not talking about asking a student to pray for the meal.  During pray request time, ask a student to immediately pray out load for any student’s request.

-  Find areas of need in your community and serve them.  After the serving encourage students to pray for them.

If you are wanting to apply the law of inertia in your youth ministry, here are some guidelines:

(1) Youth pastor must brief and debrief with the students.  It is important to always walk students through what to do and what just happend.  It is going to be uncomfortable for them to move in a new spiritual direction, so make sure to explain why and how and allow room for them to process out loud.

(2)  Document everything.  Record (both audio and visual), take pictures and write everything down on what happen and how it happened.

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Is it ludicrous to import the law of inertia into our youth group programmatic structure?  Why or why not.

What are other practical ways the law of inertia can help the spiritual life of teens?

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In my previous church context the local Mormon youth group was killing it.  They had a strong youth program with solid students.  They had a well-established community and displayed remarkable character.  I was confused why a few of our students were so drawn to Mormonism and why the Mormon youth group was so effective.  I decided to do some research so I could figure out why the Mormon community was so attractive.  I was determined to find out why Mormons did better youth ministry than the Christians.

This is what I found in my sociological Mormon youth group research:

-  Mormon students really knew how to be inclusive, communal and still knew how to have fun without alcohol

-  Mormon students didn’t really know what the Mormon doctrine was really really about

-  Mormon students tended to confuse the Christian students about Jesus and the Bible

-  Mormon students exhibited a lot of great behaviors and were extremely nice

-  Some of my Christian students were ok with dating Mormon students

-  Mormon students were not afraid to share their faith

-  Mormon students were relentlessly inviting any type of student to their activities

-  All Mormon students we interacted with in our town had two parents who deeply cared, loved, and supported them

I concluded that the Mormon students were demonstrating more of Christ’s character than our youth group community was demonstrating.  This was a painful reality to admit, but it made sense to me.  If you have an accepting, loving group of people who practice what they preach, more people will want to be a part of it.  No hypocrisy, strong inclusive community, and character were the key ingredients that made the Mormon youth group so effective.  

So I went back to the drawing board and started planning a strategy for how our youth group was going to address, equip and educate our youth group students about Mormonism.  Here was the strategy I came up with:

 (1)  I would constantly be communicating and demonstrating the high value of respect towards the book of Mormon and Mormonism.  I intentionally wanted to show my students that we were not judging the Mormons, rather we were learning from them and respecting what they believe.  I really wanted to dispel the myth that Christians are closed minded and arrogantly judge other holy books.  I wanted to move towards treating other religious students (who had differing religious beliefs that Christians) with respect while still claiming Jesus as the way, the truth and the life.  There is a fundamental difference between respecting and accepting theology.  I worked very hard for our youth group not to judge the Mormon students as we educated and equipped our teens about Mormonism.

(2)  Get students to move away from narrow-mindedness. I strove to make my students feel like they were learning about other religions, namely Mormonism without being closed minded.  Holding to Christianity as the ultimate truth is not narrow-mindedness.  Narrow-mindedness does not attach to what you believe, but how you believe it.  If our youth group refused to learn about any perspective, any religious book, or any philosophy which disagreed with the Christian doctrine – then that would be narrow-minded.  No matter what you believe there will always be opposition.  Learning about Mormonism was going to be a learning experience for everyone involved.

(3)  I committed to visiting a few local Mormon temples.  During the weeks I made multiple stops at the local Mormon temples.  During these visits, I would see if I could gather literature, multiple books of Mormon, and sit down and talk with one of the elders.  I wanted to simply befriend other religious leaders in my community and learn.

(4)  Teach on Mormonism and other holy books.  I really wanted to show how Mormonism and Christianity are drastically different.  You can explore my post about how I addressed the other holy books here and my teaching notes for how I talked about Mormonism here.  My goal was to get my students to critically and objectively think about how Mormonism and Christianity are not the same.  I wanted them to use their own brains to think.  I wanted them to process the information so they were able to have their own objective convictions about Christianity and Mormonism.  I did not want to see confusion in my students any longer.

(5)  I decided to invite an Ex-Mormon elder to come speak to our youth group.  One of my youth pastor friends had a connection to an Ex-Mormon elder, Tom Hall.  Tom was a Christian, a bit older, and a very wise ex-Mormon elder.  He spoke at youth group and had many great stories about his eldership in the Mormon temple.  Tom wrote a book titled:  Mormon Chronicles of Deception:  An Ex- Mormon Elder’s Journey to Biblical Truth.  Tom was awesome and totally connected with my students.  He gave each student his book for free and truly bestowed an inside perspective about Mormonism.  Tom initially got involved in Mormonism because he fell in love with a beautiful gal who was Mormon.  It took him a long time to be fully exposed to true Mormon theology, and he didn’t like what he learned or saw.  His journey back to Christ and Biblical truth was incredible and something the kids completely connected with.

(6) Supply students will resources.  A great historical book about Mormonism that I recommend to students was:  Under The Banner Heaven: A Story of Violent Faith.  Dare 2 Share also has some great Mormon resources for students here and here

(7)  I committed to inviting Mormon missionaries into my home so I could learn from them and ask a lot of questions.  I wanted to check out how much Mormon missionaries new about Mormonism.  I wanted to hear why they felt convinced to be Mormon.  I also was really curious about why evangelism and being on mission was so important and why they sacrificed 2 years of their lives to serve their district temples.

(8)  I asked my students to keep befriending, loving and respecting Mormon students.  I simply wanted my students to keep demonstrating the Kingdom of God.  I wanted to remind my students of the bigger Kingdom picture and not get confused as we explored Mormonism.  My hope is that all of my students will always be seeking Jesus and Truth while being the Kingdom of God here and now.

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Do you have a high Mormon population where you do youth ministry?

How do you deal with the growing influence of Mormonism in your youth group?

Are your students confused and drawn to Mormonism?

Do you agree or disagree that Mormons tend to do better ministry because of their strong inclusive community and character?

(photo by  All rights reserved by mikebitton)

Senior graduation has hit the youth ministry trenches.  Youth pastors are invited to a ton of grad parties, expected to give grad gifts, attend the ever so long grad ceremony, and speak words of affirmation to the graduates.

So let’s say a youth worker is asked to speak at a “secular” senior graduation event and he/she is encouraged to give advice to the graduates right before they hit the real world.  The community and school see him/her as the “youth expert” and are expecting great practical advice.  The school and community respect and like the youth worker, however they made it very clear they don’t want any church/Jesus/God related stuff in the talk.  What advice should a youth worker give high school seniors in a secular context?

My Advice To High School Seniors:

Friends-  Choose your friends wisely.  Seniors need to know that they are the average of the five people they spend the most time with. Surround yourself with people who are socially savvy, have a call, and know how to laugh.

Learning-  Absorb everything.  Enjoy studying.  Aristotle, the ancient Greek philosophier, believed one of the highest level of pleasure was contemplation.  One of the two components that are fundamental to enjoy life and feel good about yourself is continually learning.  If you can’t find the type of mentors that you’re looking for in a person, find them through books and don’t rule out the latest and greatest.  Top 3 books every senior needs to read:  (1) Aristotle – Nicomachean Ethics (2) CS Lewis – Mere Christianity (3) Benjamin Franklin – An American Life

Character-   Your character is everything!!  Your repetition either breaks you or helps you.  Character is like your credit rating.  Character takes years to build, but seconds to destroy.  Character is a testimony of formed habits.

Good habits formed at youth make all the difference.

- Aristotle

Serve-  The second component that is fundamental to enjoy life and feel good about yourself is serving.  Serve at a local church, homeless shelter, tutoring center, community center, local library, and/or retirement home.  Be intentional to volunteer for a non-profit.

Travel- Every high school senior should take an extended trip outside of the USA. The only way to really have a sense of how the world works is to see it yourself.  Cultures matter.  Most American don’t travel.  Experience other traditions, music, climate, religions, people, languages, and foods.  Travel doesn’t have to be expensive and is very educational.  Also make sure to travel lightly.

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I believe youth pastors will need to get better at creatively communicating the Christian life to a generation that doesn’t give a rat’s foot about the authority of the Bible, church, and Jesus.

So what would you say to a smart unhcurched senior?  What topics and issues would you address in your talk?

* Post inspired by the Holy Spirit, Lars Rood, and Nate Stratman

*  When I use the term youth parachurch organization, I am referring to organizations such as: Young Life, Fellowship of Christian Athletes, and Youth for Christ.

My argument: Youth parachurch organizations can be huge assets to youth ministries across the globe.

Problem: Many youth pastors don’t want anything to do with parachurch organizations because:

1)  They “steal” students from the church youth group.

2)  They don’t assimilate students back into the church body.

3)  They don’t concentrate on discipleship.

4)  Youth pastors have too many responsibilities within the church and wear too many hats as it is, and they don’t have the time to cultivate additional outside partnerships.

5) Parachurch communicators are not proclaiming the Gospel.  Read more here if you are curious about how and why Young Life got in trouble for not preaching the Gospel.

6) Youth pastors feel they need to focus on the students in their own church context before going beyond.

–>  I am going to show my cards…I love youth parachurch organizations.  One of my youth ministry mentors loves and worked in Young Life.  Also, I have had great success working with both FCA and Young Life.  In my experience, I love parachurch leaders because they are functioning like real world missionaries reaching lost kids. Here is my rationale for why parachurch leaders rock:

- Parachurch leaders know and pursue evangelism like it is going out of style.  Unfortunately church youth ministries have deeply failed to embrace and do evangelism effectively in a postmodern context.  Parachurch leaders have a firm focus on strategies in youth outreach, a solid theological understanding of incarnational outreach, how to appropriately talk about Jesus without looking like a cultural irrelevant freak, and do inside/out evangelism very effectively.

-  The parachurch leader knows how to fund raise and raise support.  The longevity a leader’s parachurch youth ministry efforts is determined by the success of fund raising efforts.  There is a huge urgency to raise financial support. Having to fund raise gives a ministry leader a new appreciation, focus, and mission for why they are doing what they are doing.  There is no messing around if you are having to provide the $ for your ministry – it is all business.  The parachurch leaders that I met with were always intense, focused, and on mission because they knew time and money was limited.  Therefore, they needed maximum results in a minimal amount of time.

Youth pastors can learn a lot from youth parachurch leaders and vice versa. What youth pastors need to remember when a parachurch organization comes into the community:

-  Youth parachurch organizations are the founding fathers of youth ministry.  Respect your youth ministry roots and history.  Learn more about the history of youth ministry by clicking here.

-  Do youth ministry with an urgency and with no complacency.  I have found that  major difference between a paid church youth pastor and a self funded parachurch ministry leader is that the youth pastor may be more prone to complacency.

-  Observe and assess on how parachurch organizations effectively reach the school campus for Jesus.  Last year, I was talking with a big wig for Youth for Christ and I told him I spend a lot of time on the school campus and he was surprised.  He said it is highly unlikely for a paid church youth pastor to spend x amount of hours on school campuses.  Why is that?  Every youth pastor should be a regular visible presence on the school campuses he/she serves (establish connections with school administrators and get permission, of course!).  You may be surprised to find (as I was), that school personnel will even call you directly when there are issues on campus, even if your students are not involved.

- I think paid church youth pastors can learn a thing about raising finances for a self-supported ministry.  Youth pastors cannot always rely on the church to fund the ministry vision, mission, and goals.

- Parachurch ministry leaders don’t know how to assimilate kids into your church because they don’t know that you or your church exists.  It is your job to connect with these organizations to ensure that students have a landing pad and are not left standing alone without a clue what to do with faith.  It is even better if the parachurch leader attends your church.

-  Your students may need a parachurch ministry that meets them where they are at.  Church youth group may not necessarily be the best fit for every student you come across.  Nate Stratman stated it best:  What is best for each student as far as long term spiritual formation is concerned, and how can the church and YL (parachurch) play formative roles in that process?

-  Youth pastors need to know students who attend their church are not prized possessions. They are special, important, and deserving of our time and energy, but they are not “ours.”  They belong to the Lord.  We have to learn to trust Him with them!

-  Students need more trusted adults in their life.  Research proves that students with healthy adult influences (beyond their parents) grow into healthier adults than their counterparts.

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What is your experience with parachurch organizations?

Do you have local parachurch ministries alive and thriving in your community?

What is your relationship with them?

How can we better love our parachurch friends, and partner with them to advance the Kingdom?